|
[14 Jul 2008|10:28pm] |
and yet again, i spilled my guts.
my heart screamed.
who knows, who knows.
as always.
|
|
| kiss me like the antidote is under my tongue |
[24 May 2007|02:02am] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 bouncy |
] |
so. yet again i'm still alive.
i've gotten over a lot of things.
still drinking still waking up
hungover, but the pointlessness of
it all has become something i just
don't dwell on anymore. i'm enjoying
my life, right?
missing people will never disappear.
but i've filled the void with some old friends and
amazing coworkers who have become
my best friends...
rachelle - the big sister i never had.
i take care of her kids sometimes. i
love her and them. we carparty. we see
movies we have heart to heart talks.
we drink coffee and smoke tons and tons
of cigarettes. we talk about what we're missing
and how to fix it. we are pretty much the
same person, which is oddly comforting.
froggy - the goofiest, sometimes angriest person
i know. we listen to punk music and drink alot.
hes really into ambrosia. and it makes me happy
for the both of them.
kat - no matter what whenever i really really need
someone there she is. with a chick flick and a
shoulder to cry on. she's been through a lot lately
and i respect the fact that she still carries on
head held high.
dave - mouthy drunk fucker. but one of the people
i've counted on lately. when we're both drunk and
crying about something. mainly relationships.
we've been through a lot of the same shit, went
to the same high school, had the same problems.
kyle - my best friend basically. when i need him hes
there and when i'm busy he understands. we'll always be
friends, and i'll never let him decide hes too cool
for me, lets be real if anything i'm too cool for him.
haha.
ambrosia - she just came back to town and is already seeing
one of my best friends. heh. i love that moving back hasn't
gotten her down and that we still are the worst drunks in manitowoc
county.
time for me to get back to the party.
just letting you all know i'm still okay.
|
|
| thats right bitches |
[02 Sep 2006|02:31pm] |
Which Will & Grace character are you?
Oh honey... you're Karen! But of course, you knew that all along didn't you? You just wanted to waste some time in the office by taking this quiz, before your next catalogue arrives anyway. Who care's if you've got everything in it already? It's nice to see what everyone else doesn't have! In the words of Will: "Karen, if hell ever needs an abassador..." You go girl!
Take this quiz!
Quizilla |
Join
| Make A Quiz | More Quizzes | Grab Code
|
|
|
[02 Sep 2006|01:56pm] |
so on top of losing all my friends. except
for a select few. my maybe boyfriend has
become my not at all boyfriend. and i deleted
his number from my phone and i don't want
to see him ever again. this week is gonna be
rough. <3
|
|
| sympathy for the martyr |
[14 Apr 2006|08:28pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 distressed |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
video game music |
] |
and the situations seem to worsen.
and i try my best to repress but all
that happens is i burst into tears in the
middle of public places. and i'm so afraid
of losing someone that i rely heavily on,
and i'm pretty sure hes not so afraid. because
what would he lose if he didn't have me?
nothing. and emotional, cynical, green eyed
monster, who can't control her temper in the
back of a speeding car. and everyone thinks that
i'm losing it, and i can't explain that i'm not,
its just something else. something bigger than
any of us, or our trivial problems, that seemed
to just get bigger with it. and i let all my friends
slip away, or i pushed them away, i'm not sure.
what am i left with, this shell of a person who
stopped eating and can't stop smoking or drinking
or crying and the boy that shes slowly letting herself
fall in love with, whos wonderful, but not wonderful for
her. why does she do this to herself? glutton for
punishment with a side of martyr complex.
|
|
|
[18 Mar 2006|02:34am] |
omg, i'm super drunk. i 'm in milwaukee
and its cool and oh man, this is fun.
i called up raleigh for a bootycall and hes
busy tonight, so tomorrow i will get mine.
ahahahahha. yes. anyway, i miss everyone and
i wish you were here. i love you all.
|
|
| take a long walk off of the shortest pier you can find |
[20 Feb 2006|07:06pm] |
kind of forgot that this existed.
just thought i'd update for steph
mainly, since we don't talk anymore.
joshua might come to nc with me this
summer, so that would be kick ass wouldn't
it? still boyfriendless, but whats new
about that? now i'm mildly hung up on a
boy who wants nothing to do with me when
it comes to a relationship. i'm not his
type or something. and by that i mean i weigh
over 100 lbs and have red hair. this time, the
whole whatamidoingwrong thing never kicked in.
its not me, its him. has to be. oh, who am i
kidding. <3.
|
|
|
[29 Oct 2005|04:04am] |
so i am not the queen of drama.
but damn there was a lot of drama
here tonight. but thats alright because
i love all my friends and i can i don't
want to say handle, their drama. its all
good. if i can help someone then awesome.
kyle's party was rockin and its still going
technically. i kissed raleigh before he left
and that makes me real happy. :) but yeah,
hes coming home for thanksgiving. and hell
yeah, that'll rock. kyle may be having a party
for that too. hell yes, kyle parties rock my
fucking face off. man, i need to stop tyhping.
bye.
|
|
|
[13 Oct 2005|08:44am] |
i skipped work yesterday
and i'm scared to go in tonight.
|
|
|
[05 Oct 2005|11:32am] |
Advanced Global Personality Test Results | Take Free Advanced Global Personality Testpersonality tests by similarminds.comStability results were moderately low which suggests you are worrying, insecure, emotional, and anxious. Orderliness results were moderately low which suggests you are, at times, overly flexible, improvised, and fun seeking at the expense of reliability, work ethic, and long term accomplishment. Extraversion results were high which suggests you are overly talkative, outgoing, sociable and interacting at the expense too often of developing your own individual interests and internally based identity. trait snapshot: craves attention, messy, open, rash, irritable, likes large parties, low self control, weird, fragile, does not like to be alone, emotionally sensitive, worrying, depressed, heart over mind, does not respect authority, dependent, not rule conscious, not good at saving money, more interested in relationships than intellectual pursuits, likes to fit in, very social, frequently second guesses self, phobic, suspicious, not careful, outgoing, vain, compassionate, aggressive, likes to make fun, hates to lose damn, i suck. and i forgot to tell everyone that matt yanda is my gay boyfriend, and josh got jealous. haha, i'd marry a gay man if he'd have me, which why would he because i'm a woman? but anyway, i'm retarded.
|
|
|
[05 Oct 2005|10:43am] |
okay so i guess i don't have class
today??? its an essay work day and yeah,
i'm at school for no reason. and the girl
i usually get a ride home from is not here.
so i guess i'll call rick around noon and
see if he can come get me, since we're supposed
to eat lunch together anyway. i'm not looking
forward to today or tomorrow. but yeah,
i update too much.
|
|
|
[21 Sep 2005|09:35am] |
| Your Brain's Pattern | 
Your mind is a firestorm - full of intensity and drama.
Your thoughts may seem scattered to you most of the time...
But they often seem strong and passionate to those around you.
You are a natural influencer. The thoughts you share are very powerful and persuading. |
| How You Are In Love | 
You take a while to fall in love with someone. Trust takes time.
You tend to take more than give in relationships.
You need your space and privacy. You don't like to be smothered.
You love your partner unconditionally and don't try to make them change.
You stay in love for a long time, even if you aren't loved back. When you fall, you fall hard. |
| The Keys to Your Heart | 
You are attracted to those who have a split personality - cold as ice on the outside but hot as fire in the heart.
In love, you feel the most alive when your lover is creative and never lets you feel bored.
You'd like to your lover to think you are stylish and alluring.
You would be forced to break up with someone who was emotional, moody, and difficult to please.
Your ideal relationship is comforting. You crave a relationship where you always feel warmth and love.
Your risk of cheating is zero. You care about society and morality. You would never break a commitment.
You think of marriage as something that will confine you. You are afraid of marriage.
In this moment, you think of love as something you thirst for. You'll do anything for love, but you won't fall for it easily. |
god i'm bored.
|
|
|
[20 Sep 2005|08:52am] |
this weekend was okay, i suppose.
monday night was better. rick and i
went to a party here at silver lake.
and we hung out with laura and stephanie.
man it was a good time. and i was mos def
confused and ate a lot... you know what
that means. haha. i have an oral exam now
ahhh. i'm scared. <3.
|
|
|
[18 Sep 2005|12:28pm] |
if anyone isn't mad at me
and would like to do something
today. nothing big, chill at my
house and watch movies? that
would be cool. plus, i kind of need
someone to talk to. you can call
me.681 1931. <3
|
|
|
[08 Sep 2005|03:24pm] |
so kyle and i went school shopping last night.
and i bought a bunch of stuff for my art class.
and i'm incredibly tired today. breakfast this morning
with erin and then class and then try outs. ahh.
don't know if anyone is coming with me tonight. i tried
to talk josh into it. but i don't think hes up for it
all. he would be so good at it though. :( and i hope
cohl is coming with tonight, but thats iffy.
otherwise i'll see erin there. and probably many other
people that i was in laramie with and stuff.
nothing else is going on. i miss quite a few people,
suprisingly. but hey, i have tomorrow off of work and
school so i'm good to go for anything that may come up
tonight or tomorrow.
|
|
|
[07 Sep 2005|11:38am] |
auditions for dracula are today and
tomorrow!!! i'm gonna go tomorrow i think.
6:30 - 9. cohl are you coming with me???
| #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### #################################################### | Your personality type is SLUAI | You are social, moody, unstructured, accommodating, and intellectual, and may prefer a city which matches those traits.
| | The largest representation of your personality type can be found in the these U.S. cities: New Orleans, Albuquerque/Santa Fe, Greensboro, Memphis, Providence, Washington DC, Pittsburgh, Orlando, Salt Lake City, Portland/Salem, St. Louis and these international countries/regions Puerto Rico, Iceland, Kazakhstan, Luxembourg, Turkey, Ireland, Ukraine, England, South Africa, Greece, Wales, Brazil, Switzerland, South Korea | What Places In The World Match Your Personality?City Reviews at CityCulture.org
9
|
|
|
[07 Sep 2005|11:29am] |
i only have one class today. and
um, it ended like an hour early. so
now i have nothing to do til 4 when
i work. so i'm gonna call mylissaface
and see if shes up or in class or what.
edit: joshua, did you die?
|
|
|
[06 Sep 2005|02:33pm] |
class started today. and i'm actually
having fun! even though my schedule was alittle
effed up. ambrosia came to get me during my
2 hour break and we went shopping and i got a really
cool present for cohl. and something so early
90s it makes my hair crimp and frizz. only one more
class to go... in over an hour. damnit, one class ended
early. and then its time for school shopping with joshua.
that is, if he's still up for it. i have lots of art
stuff to get. you here me??? art stuff! and i like it,
and i actually want to go, and my teacher is fun. its like
the twilight zone, even though hook nose is in that class
with me, no biggie, hes not a bad kid i suppose.
oh and i made friends with this girl who reminds me of
abbz. and she wants me to move in with her because she
hates one of her roommates. so i thought as consolation i'd
invite her to hang out with some of us tonight, so yeah
i will do that as soon as i see her again, which i don't know
when i will. otherwise no news. stuck here til like 5.
tomorrow i only have my psych class in the morning and then
i'm done. but work will continue tomorrow. bleck. but i'm
hitting up the dmv tomorrow and running lots of errands.
so should be a good time. anyway, i'm off to meander around the
school more. <3.
p.s. miss you too, holly.
|
|
|
[12 Aug 2005|11:15pm] |
| [ |
mood |
| |
 hopeful |
] |
| [ |
music |
| |
a song rick is writing |
] |
- bridget is ____.
- I think bridget should _____.
- bridget needs ______.
- Someday bridget will ________.
- bridget reminds me of _______.
- Without bridget _______.
- My most favorite memory of bridget is ________.
- bridget can be __________.
- The worst thing about bridget is _________.
please be brutally honest. i need to fix myself
to better suit your needs. haha.
i'm sad today, does that mean you're happy?
|
|
|
[23 Jul 2005|08:11am] |
i forgot i even wrote this. it
was so long ago.
a million and one thoughts
float through my head. do
they float through yours?
sometimes i wonder if you think
of me. when you're with her.
when you touch her cool soft liquid-like skin; when you
look into her velvet, deep
sea, eyes, with the twinkle
of another galaxy in them.
when you listen to her crystalsex
voice; are you thinking
of me then? no. no. i didn't
think so. if i cried long enough would you>?
if she let one tear slide from her
tear duct you'd fall to pieces.
'i'll make you a god' she says.
|
|
| navigation |
| [ |
viewing |
| |
most recent entries |
] |
| [ |
go |
| |
earlier |
] |
|
|
|
|
![[info]](http://l-stat.livejournal.com/img/userinfo.gif){kind=small}
loveisdyingoff's journal
